I recently found out that my cousin might be my brother. And now it really seems that it is very likely that he is. This is on my dad’s side. So I saw this cousin, and my other cousin on Friday. It turned out that pretty much my whole family has known this and never told me. We said we should get DNA testing to be sure.
Well, my other cousin went to sleep so we stayed up to visit and he was kind enough to give me a back rub, since you know, I’m always in pain. Next thing I know, he is doing very inappropriate things…. my cousin… and possibly brother? I got him to go to bed and thankfully had two friends help me that night. I’d had a few drinks so I couldn’t drive myself, I felt pretty helpless.
My friend brought me back the next day for my car, I didn’t go in the house or anything. I just wonder, what the hell is wrong with people? Don’t they know boundaries? Have they no human decency? I’ve had a pretty fucked up life I must say, more than some, less than others… I just keep trying to move forward and put these sort of things behind me.
It just makes me worried about the future, what other nonsense will I run into along the way? Anyway, I’m feeling a bit better now, apparently better enough to write about it. I do still feel pretty alone though. I wish it was Monday so I could be at work and school, around people. I’m gonna put on some good music though, and clean my room. Then I should think about trying to do some homework I s’pose. I hope you’re doing good.
